Jar of Hearts

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A dark sky envelops the horizon. Brilliant stars pierce the cloudy realms in the churn. The rush of air outside my speeding coach drowns out most sounds from the surrounds.

A mewling from a baby drifts through the darkness. The soft notes of a lullaby which follows brings on the sting of tears.

So close yet so far, the last step forward too heavy. A coach full of hearts, and not one of those hearts belongs to me. A city bustling with spirits, not one aligned to mine.

To whom do I belong? Where is my Jar of Hearts? Hundreds of radiant minds I’ve met since I first drew breath, and how many of those do I remember now?

There is this part of me which is always waiting. Waiting in the quiet, waiting for rejection. For I know not whom to trust. Or on whom to rely.

Each to-day I meet new persons, so similar to yester-day. And all so wonderful, all so happy and gay. All so kind and all nice they say.

And sadly yester-day, some of them simply wore masks. And left me blind to see through the colourful sketches drawn on. And to-day is no different, for I know not to find the mask, to tear it off.

So how do I collect my Jar of Hearts, how do I let loose my kite? How do I know whom to trust. Or on whom to rely.

I stand alone. I know none to be with me. I remember faces flying past my mind’s eye. Memory fails when I look for those who never made me cry. And still I pull forward, for to stand still is to be left behind.

Yet to cling is to know that I stand weak. How much longer can I hold on? How do I know I won’t be left  behind? How do I risk my heart out there with those unkind?

How do I believe? How many do I search ‘till I fill my Jar of Hearts? For I know not whom to trust. Or on whom to rely.

All I know is that the sky is dark pierced with brilliant stars. And I wander alone with my Jar of Hearts. I stumble, I fall, but I'll play my part.

So long as I have my Jar of Hearts.