We live in a world in this age, where
nobody seems to care about anyone else. Genuine care and regard is rare, and
precious, but also, few in between. At the same time, everyone wants to poke
their nose into other people’s business.
Where is the neighbour’s son working? Mr
K’s daughter is going out with Mr M’s son, do you know! The family on the
fourth floor are pregnant; again!
There’s no dearth for gossip, and with so
much fodder lying about, it is easy to pick up upon it..! Such is the state of
affairs in today’s day. I have to admit, I have a love for picking up
information passing down the grapevine too. It’s the easiest way to stay up to
date on everyone’s lives.
Gossip is a source of information, a common
ground, upon which people come together, bond and rally forth. No two people
are closer, than those who have shared a particularly juicy bit of titbit on
the latest happenings on the people around them!
In fact, I say Facebook and Twitter are two
of the largest Gossip Queens ever. A common platform where people can pick up
on the latest natter, a place where wannabes can advertise their current
successes in life; a public stage where the internet bullies can strike, and
the online heroes can swoop in to save!
The problem arises when a person does not
understand when to put the gossip aside and resume his own life. When he has to
have a finger in every pie, and offer good-natured advice, which he fails to
realize is ill-received.
I mean, seriously, how does it matter to
anyone at all that the 3rd floor neighbour does not have a baby
after years of marriage..? It is a private matter, and therefore, absolutely
closed to anybody who is not the husband or the wife! But, we have the well-meaning
duennas of the family, meddlesome neighbours, and even pesky cousins, all
asking about the couple’s family plans..!
And the sad thing is, the couple may be
putting off having a baby because they’re waiting to be financially
independent, or because they’re not ready to be parents and do not want kids
yet, or because they do not want babies, period. Or perhaps, they have been
trying desperately for a baby, and have not had success yet…
How heart-breaking do you think it is to be
pestered for a new addition to the family, when the wife has suffered a
miscarriage just a month back..? How completely shattering is it to be given
‘friendly’ advice on early parenthood, when the couple has faced failed IVF
treatments?
Or, for that matter, to be asked after multiple
failed interviews about the latest job prospects? To be asked after a terrible
heartbreak about future marriage plans? To be asked exam after entrance exam,
when they’re going to get on with their further studies …
Well-meaning meddlers and malicious
relatives aside, even parents sometimes fail to recognize that sometimes, their
children just need some time and space. To be able to face new experiences and
challenges. To grow. To heal…
And it is the fault of this society that
illnesses which are common, and for which patients should seek treatment, are
hidden and made to suffer. Illnesses such as OCD, Obsessive Compulsive
Disorder, or depression and anxiety, which are common, diseases, and for which
help needs to be sought are hushed up, and pushed under the blankets.
Where there is a need to speak about the
problems, to express and to garner support for the patient, gossip mongers send
them into hiding, worsening symptoms of a disease that already causes so much
of havoc in their lives.
There really should be some ground rules
set up about this sort of thing. A set of guidelines which can define what is
taboo, and what is not. For instance, guests who are couples should not be told
to come in ‘threes’ on the next visit. Sexual orientation of any person is not
to be questioned. A person suffering from depression is not to be targeted for any gossip.
Anyone with common sense should be able to
understand that these are common courtesies, and need not be instilled
especially. But as we all know, common sense is no longer common anymore…
She
sits at the window, with red-rimmed eyes… Hands on her stomach, unsteady her
gaze lies…
When the summons come to demand an heir for the dynasty, her heartbreak seems
naught in the face of their ‘tragedy’…
She
sits at the window, with books and quills abound… Envelopes scattered, piled in
a mound…
When the summons come to question her intentions on her travels to study, her
shame seems naught in the face of their curiosity…
She
sits at the window, with her face bowed… Hands quivering with anxiety, her
spirit crushed and cowed…
When the summons come to question why she is sad when all are merry, her fears
seem naught in the face of their illiteracy…
No comments:
Post a Comment